when youre wearin a cute outfit in winter and someone is like “aren’t you COLD” excuse me you are weak and your crops will never last the winter with that attitude
Adulthood doesn’t mean you stop drinking juice pouches and eating fruit snacks. It means buying your own.
and mixing them with vodka
At 3 in the morning while marathoning your favorite show because nobody can tell you to go to bed.
And then regretting your decisions the next morning.
Because you have to work.
and make more money to buy fruit snacks and juice pouches.
and more vodka
Maturity is overrated, but no one at least questions you when you buy vodka.
Chris Hemsworth (via fuckyeahblackwidow)
#and scarjo would be pulling one of those actor-director deals actually running the whole show #from a chair that is precisely 10 inches higher than everybody elses #and all the boys are terrified of her; but also take great pride in being her willing minions #’yes scarjo; i chris hemsworth major movie star shall run down to starbucks and inform them to make you a nonfat pumpkin spice mocha frappuc #’chris i asked for a triple espresso shot’ #’your WISH MADAM’ #’shuttup and help me hoist these lights into your old treehouse’ #avengers #how to tag????#give me the black widow film or give me death (via okayophelia)
1. state your name: Samantha
2. state the name that your parents almost named you: …?
3. which of your relatives do you get along with the most? "this asshole" aka my baby brother
5. did anything embarrassing happen this week? said baby brother was being more awkward than normal while drunk…
6. white chocolate or dark chocolate? white
7. do people praise you for your looks? sometimes? usually when I feel like I look subpar
8. what is your favorite color of clothing to wear? I wear quite a bit of olive green, peach, turquoise blue, and of course, black.
9. how do you wear your makeup? BB cream, concealer, eye primer then powder as the base. UD in Midnight Cowgirl on my entire lid, (sometimes) a secondary color in the outer corner/crease, always followed by winged liquid eyeliner (usually black, but occasionally other colors). Mascara, NARS blush in Orgasm, and lipcolor (usually just a tint but sometimes blood-of-my-enemies red).
10. what are some of your nicknames? Sam, Sammy
11. how many bedrooms are in your house? uno
12. how many bathrooms? uno
13. do you have a job? I’m a bartender at a country club. Yay for flexible hours to work with my school schedule!
14. do you have a car? My precious baby, which is an ‘02 Nissan Xterra
15. do you work out every week? negative ghostrider.
16. have you ever kissed someone you never saw again? oh yes.
19. have you ever sung in front of a crowd? yes, back in high school as part of my church youth group.
20. what kind of bathing suit do you wear? I own an obnoxious amount of swimsuits for a pasty person who bathes in sunscreen. Most are bikins with halter tops.
21. do you like your eyes? Yes. I actually get lots of compliments on them.
22. do you think you are pretty? about 2/3 of the time.
23. who was the last person you talked to in person? the lovely lady at Sonic who provided me with my daily dose of my caffeine addiction
24. how much money is in your account? wow, that’s not any of your business.
25. are you single? yes.
26. do you want kids? eventually.
27. tell me what your backpack looks like: I don’t own a backpack. Mostly I just use one of my grocery totes if I have to pack more than will fit in my purse.
28. what celebrity do you think is hot? Chris Evans, Christina Hendricks, young John Waye, Maureen O’Hara…
29. last movie you saw in theaters: Thor: The Dark World
30. are you dating the same person you dated last year? nope
31. has someone you were dating ever cheated on you? not to my knowledge
32. have you ever cheated? no
33: have you kissed someone whose name starts with a ‘J’? yup, several of them.
34: What do you like to do in your spare time? Read, cook, sleep
"Wow, this turned out pretty good."
"…and I am totally licking the spoon right now."
"…like Chris Evans’ abs"
*cue hysterical laughter from me and BFF*